Home!

I haven't posted in a while.  I guess I've just been busy being home.  It's really nice to not be in someone else's home or a hotel anymore.  I like to have a little bit of control over my living space...

Sometimes I get this really heavy feeling, like maybe I'm not doing the right thing.  This is pretty serious, what I'm doing...  There's a lot of stuff involved in it. A lot of big stuff.  I guess I'm just worried about making a big mistake...

On the other hand, I see these people who say things like "I wish I had done that" or "If only I'd done this while I had the chance" and I don't want to be them.  I like to say that I have no real regrets in my life. I don't feel like I've done anything that I seriously regret doing, and I don't feel like I missed out on doing anything that I seriously wish I'd done.  Even if I moved to Europe and decide that I didn't want to live there forever after all, that wouldn't be a regret because it would be a learning experience.  It would be a different story if I just stayed here, I think....

Blah, blah. Blah blah blah.

I need a job.

Florida.

Well, here I am. Back in the States. I'm exhausted. It's only 8:30 right now but I feel like I should be sleeping already. It doesn't help that last night we were up until two in the morning. I feel like I should have gone to bed hours ago.

So, first time in Florida. Not really my cup of tea I guess. To start with, it's just too hot. It's December, I don't want hot in December. Grandma and Grandpa's house is nice though. Tomorrow we're going to Disney World and then Christmas Eve we get to see my cousin Sarah. What a busy week we have.

I'm fairly certain that I had a lot more to write. I'm so tired that I can't remember, though.

It's just so weird to be back in the US. It's weird to look around and see so many enormous vehicles. It's weird that tax is added at the register rather than included in the shelf price. It's weird that the towns are so big, with a lot of open space. It's even weird that the toilets have so much water in them. I'm not used to this stuff anymore, and that's (like I said) really weird. I don't feel like those things really stood out that much to me when I got to Europe. But I guess I got used to it...

I want internet. I hate not having internet. I think I should go to bed...

How quickly things change...

Four months ago, I sat in an airplane at John F. Kennedy airport in New York, waiting for the plane to take off and fighting back tears.  I didn't want to leave home.
It's hard to believe that today, I can be the same person, sitting in an airplane in Amsterdam trying not to cry again.  I don't want to go home.

I don't feel any different than I was six months ago, or a year ago. But at the same time, I know I've grown a lot during my time here.  I know they say there's no way you can come out of studying abroad unchanged, and I have to agree that being in Europe these past four months has irreversibly changed my life.   It's so strange to think of all the people I've met who I probably won't see or talk to again, so really they were just there to be a part of my experience.  And of course I have to come back as soon as I can, because I'm not the kind of person who can be content with just coming here and then returning home and having stories to share.  I still have more growing to do, I guess.

So for tonight, I'm staying in Paris. I've had a wonderful day (please excuse the sarcasm leak, we're working on fixing that).  I love traveling and I love flying but I hate airports.  I particularly hate checking bags.  I have three bags: my big suitcase, a medium duffel bag, and a backpack.  My backpack has to be carry-on because it has my laptop in it.  When I got to the airport in Amsterdam, the lady who checked my bag told me that I could take my duffel bag as carry-on too, because it was light enough.  She checked my big suitcase, but it was overweight so I had to pay for that.  Then, when I went to go through security, this guy stopped me and told me we had to go weigh my carry-on bags.  And with my two bags combined, my carry-on was too heavy. So I had to check the duffel bag after all. Luckily, they did not charge me for having a second bag. What a pain, this business of checking bags. I'm tired of it. However, none of my flights for today or tomorrow are connecting flights, so I'm going to have to check them at least one more time. Hopefully I can talk them into checking them all the way through to my final destination tomorrow, but if not I'll have to re-check them again in New York.  I've rearranged some stuff between my big suitcase and my duffel bag, so hopefully that will do to make my suitcase not be overweight.  Tomorrow, we will see...

Now, I'm starving.  I had breakfast this morning because I got up way too early, and then at the airport I went by Starbucks for a giant caramel mocha and this teriyaki beef sandwich.  I guess I should pay more attention to labels because I didn't realize that teriyaki beef was going to come with cucumber and wasabi mayonnaise (and green onions but I don't mind those) but in the end it wasn't a problem, the beef part was good...  There's a restaurant across the street called Hippopotamus and I'm debating on whether or not I should go try it.  I've seen them around before and I've looked at the menu online but I'm not sure if I'm interested. But I'm very hungry...  There's a restaurant in the hotel but it doesn't sound exciting.

We will see. I probably won't post again until I'm back in the US.  Wow, can't believe that's tomorrow.

Here comes fun...

So today is my last day of vacationing in the Netherlands. It's very sad.  Tomorrow starts my two joyful days of travel.  I'm not overly excited for that.  I have to get up fairly early to grab a tram (or more likely, a bus) to Den Haag Centraal station and then from there, take a lovely train to Amsterdam, where I have a 12:30 flight to Paris.

Hopefully I will be able to locate the post office in the Charles de Gaulle, as I have some things to send places. (I forgot to leave my host family's house key.  I feel bad.)  It's a lot more expensive to send things to Europe from the States than it is from within Europe...  I was going to try to find a post office in the Netherlands to do that but it seemed like too much work... However, I land in Paris around 13:45 and my next plane does not leave until the next morning around 8:30 so I believe I have time to find a post office. I read that there is one in the airport, it's just a matter of finding it.

So after leaving Paris at 8:30 in the morning, I will be landing in New York around 10:30 in the morning. I'm going to be traveling back in time!  If only the plane would fly faster, then I could really be traveling back in time.  I don't have the slightest clue what I will do in New York to occupy my time because my next plane from there doesn't leave until 18:45.  Such long days of travel.

I'm really hoping I can check my bags all the way from Amsterdam to Florida.  If I can, that would be awesome. I went and withdrew some money today though, just in case I can't. I don't know if my card will work at the airport so I would rather be safe than sorry. I will try my card first, pay with cash if that doesn't work...  Checking bags is expensive. I have two bags.  In Europe, that's first bag free, second bag 55 euros.  In the US with Delta, I believe it'll be $25 for the first bag and $35 for the second.  I really hope they aren't overweight. If they were for the first flight, the lady didn't make note of it. I thought they must have been, though. Perhaps she was just being nice.

And after all that, I will be in Florida. Yay, Florida! I know it will definitely be warmer than here in the Netherlands. But only for a short time, before I go to Idaho and freeze to death.  I became far too accustomed to the warmer weather in southern France... I have to re-adjust. It'll be fun.

So, I really didn't do much today, honestly.  I slept in today (until 10:30.  Lazy bones). Then I went downtown for a couple hours and took a nice long walk there (and searched for an ATM) but then I came back to the hostel and decided I'd just relax some.  Tonight I have to make sure all my stuff is packed in a plane-friendly way.  Tomorrow I'm going to eat breakfast! I hope.  If not, that's alright too.

I LOVE IT HERE!

Look, I'm in there! Can you see me?  Can you, can you????  Don't worry, neither can I!  But it was so awesome!  Hold on, I have another one. (I didn't take either of these two pictures, Jenny found them online.)

There in the front with the blue and brown hat?? That's Tessa. Jenny and I were right behind her. We were in the front for Snow Patrol!  And Gary Lightbody, the lead singer? We got to touch his hand. We had some much fun!

So I took a few pictures for everyone who wants to see, I'm just waiting for them to upload. Give me a minute.

At this moment, I'm very happy with all these decisions I've been making. I really do like it here in the Netherlands. And it's winter!  I bet the summer will be even better.  The Hague is huge, the school is huge too, but it's a nice place, it seems.  It might be a challenge finding a place to live but maybe a challenge is what I need!  I can handle it.  And one of these days, I'll learn Dutch. I will probably learn to understand it before I learn to speak it but hey, that'd still be progress.  I've already caught on to a few words and phrases here and there.  I'm a linguistics nerd, it's only a matter of time.

So I have a couple pictures, let's see what we have.

This is one side of the university, courtesy of my own lovely photography.  No big deal, I suppose.

Another side of the school. Yes, it is surrounded by water. One of the many things I love about Europe, there is water everywhere. I love water!  And a school with skyways.  Yeaaaa.  Such a fancy school.

Ummm. Let's see, what else do I have?

The beach!  Scheveningen.  You know, the town whose name I can't say.

Drawings in the sand. Really sweet.

LAST BUT NOT LEAST!

Yes, we stood around waiting for 5 hours to watch Snow Patrol sing six songs! AND IT WAS AWESOME!  

Not to mention that being in the front is also very awesome. NOT TO MENTION WE WERE ON NATIONAL TELEVISION!  It snowed and rained all over us while we were standing there. It was packed and crowded and we were squished.  It couldn't have been any better. Pretty sure nothing can top that.

Except these hats.  Ten euros to charity, so worth it!
And my cursed Scandinavian eyes.  Thank you, Grandpa!

Oh yea, almost forgot.  The video where I'm on national television.

Coldddd

Okay, I know this temperature is nothing compared to at home. But I've been in southern France. You have to give me a break. It didn't get colder than 4 or 5 degrees the whole time I was there (or, uh, 40 degrees fahrenheit) and it especially rarely even got that low.  It usually stayed around 10-12 (50-55F)  Here, it's been raining all the time and at the moment it's 2 degrees out.  It's so cold!!  I know, just last week I say that it was -11(C) at home, so I have to stop complaining about here because it'll be colder in two weeks, in Idaho.

In other news, I'm tired. Lots of walking happened today.  It's okay, it's good for me.  I'm pretty sure of that. I'll let you know after I can feel my feet again.  We also went to the beach.  They have very nice beaches here. Regardless of wind and rain.  The beach has all these colorful teeny tiny shells, in abundance.  I don't think I've ever seen that on a beach... Only small pieces of bigger shells, and not nearly as many.

I'm seriously freezing. Could it be any colder in my room?  I chose to stay in a 24-bed room because it was cheapest, but there are only two other people in here beside me.  I've named them.  Snorey guy and sleeps-til-noon guy.  Their names are self-explanatory. I'm not sure who left the window open but it's still open and it's so cold in here.  Maybe it wouldn't be so cold if I was in my bed with blankets on me but there's no outlet over there to charge my laptop.

I went downstairs to buy a drink from the drink machine.  There are five options. Coke, Diet Coke, Fanta, Minute Maid, or Heineken.  The Heineken has two paper arrows pointing to it, and the arrows have the word "beer" written on them in probably 20 different languages.  Also, it said Minute Maid apple juice but it gave me orange juice and it's really gross orange juice, too....

Apparently, tomorrow I am going to a Christmas market and then a Snow Patrol concert. Yay!  Should be fun.  I think I'll go to Starbucks too. I could use a warm drink.

I'M LEARNING DUTCH!

Well.  I had a good day today.  Lots of exploring.  I found a lot of things. Found the right tram. Found the beach (but couldn't get to it).  Found the school. Found the Subway by the school.  Found Jenny (or she found me).

Then we took a walk, where we found a movie theater and bought tickets to see New Year's Eve, then we walked across the street to eat at McDonald's until it was time for the movie.  New Year's Eve was a very good movie, it was pretty funny.  Then we went back to McDonald's for McFlurries.  Then we walked to the train station so I could take a bus and Jenny could take a train.  The end.

I believe tomorrow we're going shopping (but I'm not buying anything because my suitcases are stuffed), and we might try to find a part of the beach that is accessible.  They are doing construction on the dikes at the place where I tried to go. Maybe other parts of the beach will be open...  I mean, I know the dikes in the Netherlands are important, so they can do construction on them whenever they want. BUT I WANTED TO SEE THE BEACH!!!

I guess it's all the better that way. I might not have been able to stay on the beach very long anyways. It was super rainy and windy by the ocean.  Maybe tomorrow will be better. I doubt it, but that's okay.

Alright! I wanna make it down for my free breakfast tomorrow! Goodnight!

BEACH!!!

Good morning!  I woke up this morning (the seagulls woke me up) and discovered the reason why every time I woke throughout the night, I couldn't feel my nose.  The window is open. Don't you people know it's almost freezing temperatures out there?

In other news, I think I'm going to take a walk to the beach here shortly.  Then I'm going to go find the university and explore a little.  It's enormous, I'll probably get lost.  It'll be fun.  Rumor has it there's a Subway by the university... I gotta find that, for sure.  And the enrolment centre (my computer's spellcheck doesn't like British English...) so I can show them my ID and prove that I am who I say I am. Then I think I'm done with the whole "enrolling" thing...

And since I know that's what everyone always wants, today I might do a little wandering and take pictures.  Lots of pictures.  Maybe. If I feel like it.  I might just take four million pictures on the beach and then forget everything else. I like the beach... Did you know that?

So I guess I just don't have a lot to say because all I've seen of this place is a train station, busy streets at night, and a hostel.  I just felt like posting, that's all.  SO THERE!  One thing I do know, the Hague is a lot bigger than Amsterdam because it is a lot more spread out... Though Amsterdam is technically a bigger city because it is more densely populated.

Okay. That's all for now. Bye!

Airplanes and Airports

I left my umbrella on the airplane. I don't know why I'm so upset over it, it was just an umbrella. I am upset though.  I know, I could just go buy another umbrella.  But it's not the same...  I guess it's the fact that, it's not just an umbrella, it's a memory.  My mother bought me that umbrella when we were in Paris together.  I know, umbrellas never last forever anyways... I'm still really mad at myself over it.  I just want my umbrella back...

I'm hanging out in the airport in Lyon for a couple hours until my next flight.  I feel like I'm going to be doing that a lot this week. Oh by the way, checking two bags is a pain.  It scared me to death when the lady in Pau looked at my bags and said, "You can't take two, you can only have one."  What do you mean I can only have one!  I already have two!  Then she said you have to pay to have two.  Well duh, lady. I already knew that.  Thankfully, the airport in Lyon has some nice internet for me to use. I'm pretty sure the airport in Paris doesn't... And I'm also pretty sure that JFK airport in New York doesn't. And those layover are even longer than this one here.  It might just be a nightmare. Yay!

I got my last look at the Pyrenees from the window of an airplane earlier. It made me extremely sad.  Same with looking around Pau and thinking, "Wow, this is the last time I'm seeing this place."  And then there's the fact that I won't see my host parents ever again. I mean, it wasn't really a tearful goodbye on anyone's part but still.  Oh, and I forgot to leave their house key.  I'm not sure if it's a good idea to send those in the mail but I don't know any other way to get it back to them.  I was in such a hurry to get out of there (the taxi meter was running) that I didn't even think about it.

I'm happy to be leaving France. No matter where I go, I'm not in France.  Yea, I guess in a few ways I'm excited to go home. I wish I could stay in Europe instead. That probably wouldn't be the smart thing though.  I'd just want to go places, and then I'd run out of money.

Six days and then homeward bound!  See you soon Mom and Dad! And Alyssa! And Grandma and Grandpa!  And lots of other people too.

Time to go!

Tomorrow I will be on a plane headed to the Netherlands. A week from today, I will be on a plane headed back the United States. And two weeks from today, I'll finally be going home. It's hard to believe the semester is really over. What do I do now??

I know, I shouldn't be saying that. I already have a plan. I know what I'm doing now. No matter what, I always have a plan. Though, this is by far my favorite plan. I'm actually looking forward to it for once.

My hostel for the next 4 nights is on the beach. I love the beach, but I'm not so sure about the beach when it's near freezing temperature. I'm sure it'll be pretty to look at either way. I gotta take lots of pictures! I know, that doesn't really mean much when I say that I've taken tons of pictures lately but no one has seen them but me because I haven't posted them.

In other news, either my host dad thought we were going to starve tonight or they were trying to over-stuff me for my last meal with them. It wasn't big and fancy or anything, just a lot of stuff. First he told me to help myself to the pâté and bread. Then he offered me salad. Then there was this vegetable cake thing that reminds me of quiche a little (but it's different. I don't know how to explain it).  After that, a little pizza... After that, a big ham and cheese croissant.  I ate everything he offered me. I ate too much.

I'm all packed. My room is clean. I have a taxi lined up for tomorrow. Mango's on my bed visiting me for probably the last time. I'm going to try to go to bed early tonight. I guess I'm ready. I can't believe I'm leaving already.  I'm so ready to leave. I think I've said all this already. But it's still true.

Yay!

3 more days!

I took pictures Saturday. I'll post them eventually but right now I don't feel like it. I'm lazy, and posting pictures takes forever. Plus I have to create special links for all of them so that they'll work on my blog.  It's tough stuff.  What a hard life I have, right?

I have two more days of classes, and then a pretty test, and then I get to get on an airplane and get the heck out of Dodge.  All I have to worry about is missing that airplane... It'll be fine. I think.

Once again I have not much to say.  I'm excited to go back to the Netherlands this weekend. It's going to be fun.  I have to decide when I'm going to want to come back (to move there), also... At the beginning of the summer when Mom and Dad move north, so I can find a job there before school starts?  Or the beginning of August, so I can sit around up north in Grangeville like a bum for two months? Well gee, when you put it that way...

My computer needs some tender loving care... I don't know how I have such bad luck with computers. I'll admit, I wasn't very nice to my last computer.  But I have no idea what I've done to my laptop to make the fans kick into overdrive every time I open it, the minute it comes on. It hasn't even started doing anything yet, it can't possibly need fans!!  It's so loud.  And in the past two days, it's randomly gone into hibernation 4 times to 'prevent overheating' (so said the screen when I turned it back on) and I'm just a little frustrated with the whole thing.  Poor computer.

Anyways, I'm exhausted. Goodnight.

Happy Saturday!

Last night, I opened a piece of chocolate and the inside of the wrapper told me, "Il n'y a rien plus triste qu'une vie sans hasard."  There is nothing more sad than a life without risk.  I kind of needed that, chocolate wrapper, thank you.

I guess I've been a little worried about these decisions I've been making lately. It's not that I haven't really thought about them, I am pretty sure I know what I'm doing.  I feel completely confident that I know how to handle that kind of thing now.  I believe six months ago I wouldn't have felt even halfway capable of doing what I want to do.  So in that respect, I know I'll be okay.  There's just a lot to worry about...

Also, I really can't wait. It feels so long from now. Maybe the time will pass quickly. It seems like last summer passed quickly, while looking forward to coming to France. Actually, I don't really know what happened to that summer. Are you sure it existed?  If it did, it really seems like it was a million years ago (or perhaps more).



Now I'm leaving France in 5 days. The time here has passed really quickly too... I didn't want to pack everything until a day or two before I leave but I couldn't help it. I'm mostly packed up. I have stuff that I don't want, but I don't know what to do with them. I don't feel right throwing away perfectly good clothing and shoes, but I can't wear them because they are too big for me.  I could go donate them but the place to donate is way out of town and I can't get there by myself...  I'm not really sure.  Maybe I can take them to the Netherlands with me before I go home and ask the people at my hostel if there is somewhere nearby where I can donate unwanted clothing.  Then I'll only have to drag them around with me as far as the Netherlands.  Either way, there's no way all my stuff is going to fit in just one suitcase so I will be paying to check a second bag...  Maybe I could just make them a little easier to drag around though...

I don't know what I'm going to do in Paris. I will get to Paris at 1:30 in the afternoon on the 20th and I leave Paris at 8:30 in the morning the next day.  I don't want to go all the way into the city but I don't know how costly the hotels out by the airport are.... That's an awful long time to spend sitting around the airport with my bags though. And I know I wouldn't get any sleep.

Christmas!

Oh. My god.

So, I felt a little bad today because I skipped all my classes. I probably shouldn't have done that.  I can't even say I made up for it by doing something productive--I stayed home most of the day.  However, around 4pm I decided to go downtown and find something to eat and maybe wander around a bit.  I should have taken a camera, but I forgot.

This little town that I am living in. It is so cute!

I never really paid much mind to the speakers mounted around town above the storefronts, maybe every 3 to 4 stores along the side streets, and on all the light poles down the main street.  Today, when I got downtown, there was music playing. Everywhere you walked you could hear it because of those nice evenly-spaced speakers all over downtown.  It was so cool.  At first it was just random music but then when it started to get darker it was all Christmas music and all the Christmas lights place around town lit up. That was the point that I wished I had my camera. I'm going back tomorrow, I hope the weather is nice again (it was only 60 degrees out) so I can take pictures of all the pretty downtown-ness.  The only thing that the image was missing was snow.  It would have been perfect.  Even so, I loved it.

I probably walked around for about 2 hours before I decided to go catch a bus home.  Oh I also bought a book at the fnac first. A French book.  It was 7 euros, I thought that was pretty cheap.  Now I'm reading it.  I had a pretty good day, if I do say so myself.  And it's Friday! Got the weekend to do nothing (well, other than going downtown tomorrow to take pretty pictures).

And then I have 3 days of classes left, and a big test Thursday. Wow. I'M SO EXCITED!

Long two weeks...

These next two weeks are going to pass extremely slowly. I have a lot to worry about.

I apologize for that post last night. I've been trying to keep things like that out of my blog. It really doesn't belong here.

Luckily I only have about a week of classes left and then I have a lovely test.  And then, as suggested by Andrea, I'm going back to the Netherlands. Yay!  I can't wait.

And then home. Well, first Florida. Never been to Florida.  Should be interesting.  I can't wait for Christmas, and I can't wait to go home and relax a bit (rather than being in this house here...) and I can't wait to see my family and my poor cat and rabbit.  And then I can't wait to come back to Europe.

Yea, I don't really have much to say today...


P.S. To my apparent readers from Russia, I don't really understand.  But I have 75 page views from Russia so I guess if you really like my blog that much, continue reading.

24.

24 pounds I have lost here in France. I've been here for 13 weeks.  I worry about going back to the US. I don't want to gain it all back. I'm going to have to go on daily long walks or something.

I guess Europe just sits well with me...  Even in London, I expected to have gained a bit back because I felt like I ate like a pig in London. But even there I lost weight.  With all the bread that I eat in France, I should be gaining weight. I really love it.  Someone suggested it was all the walking, but I really don't do that much walking.  I walk between home and the bus stop, that's not far. Then between the bus stop and the school buildings, also not very far. Occasionally I might go downtown and walk around a bit but never very much and definitely not very often.  Of course, there have been some of my weekend excursions where I did a lot of walking.  Paris, London, Amsterdam and Carcassonne all definitely killed my legs.  That's not much though...  I don't know.



And as a closing for this, I just want to tell you that I'm extremely sick and tired of this family that I am living with.  I get it, I'm not the perfect person they expect me to be. I'm really tired of being yelled at for being myself. Not even 10 minutes ago, my host mother walked into my room and started yelling at me because she doesn't understand why I bothered wasting my parents' money (MY PARENTS DIDN'T PAY FOR THIS, LADY, HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU THAT. I PAID FOR IT. MY MONEY.) in coming here to do things I could do at home because I don't talk to anyone, I don't ever go downtown, I don't go anywhere. I don't understand how she has any right to say any of that stuff.  Up until this point, I've literally been gone every single weekend visiting other cities and other places. How do you come off saying I don't go anywhere?  And you know what, after a long day of 2-3 hour classes (Not to mention our nice long 2 hour lunch breaks where I sit around and talk to people or go downtown. You know, those things that she says I never do.) I can't help it if I just want to come home.  I can only tell a person so many times that I don't like to go out with friends 24/7 before I'm just really tired of this.  I'm tired of all of it.   I don't care how much of a waste you think I've made, lady.  None of this feels like a waste to me.  The only thing that feels wasted is the fact that I had to live in your home.  You know one of the main reasons I've tried to go somewhere every weekend is because then I don't have to be HERE.

I'm just done. I've been trying and I can't try any more.  I've reached my limit with these people. I am going to talk to Ryan and Robina tomorrow and if they can't get me out of here I don't know what I'm going to do. I can't be here anymore.

Oh boy.

I am done with being here. I just want to throw that out there. I am so done with this family that I have to live with.  And that's all I'm going to say about that.

I've suddenly been doing a lot of things that a lot of people think are absolutely insane... Alright, maybe I am a little insane, but I feel that I am well within my reason.

I cancelled my spring semester in Spain.  There were a lot of reasons that I wanted to go, and a lot of reasons why I didn't want to go.  It does make me sad that I don't get to live on the beach in southern Spain.  And I'm definitely more than a little sad that my sister doesn't get to come visit me there.  Also, I was really looking forward to learning about Spanish culture and especially try out some Spanish food.  On the other hand, I have been thinking more and more lately that maybe I just don't want to study Spanish that badly.  It would be a really fun experience, yes.  But it's a lot of money that I could be putting to a better use.

Speaking of which...  I'm in the process of enrolling at a Dutch university to start in the fall--meaning that I'm quitting my school in the States and starting over.  I guess I just decided that I do really want to move to the Netherlands, and there is no better time than now. I don't need to explain myself or justify that because it's my life and they are my choices, but I do know that quite a few people think I'm insane for it.  The point is, I've already screwed up a lot with my schooling at Boise State.  The only classes that I have actually passed are my language classes and one calculus class. They don't transfer to the school in the Netherlands.  But I don't need them to.  I want to start over.  I want to start right.  Without failing classes and making mistakes.  If I try to finish school in the US first, I feel like I would really be wasting time and money.  And, as my mother pointed out, it's better to make a move like that when I am young and do not have too many personal belongings or things like that to worry about.  Moving into an apartment in Boise for 3 years to finish school would mean I would need to obtain a lot more personal belongings...  The more I have thought about this, the more I really feel like I am doing the right thing.

I'll be heading home in sixteen days. I'm so ready to leave France. I'm very sad that I have to leave Europe though.  I do like it here... My host family has kind of ruined this for me.  I will be back though!  We're officially done on the 15th and then I fly home on the 21st. I want to find something to do for those days in between but I'm not sure that I could... It would be cool to be able to go to Italy or one of the places I haven't been yet, but I don't want to spend that much money and I have no one to go with. I might just be stuck here in Pau, with my host family...

I'm craving food right now. Particularly because I'm starving.  I would like a Spanish tortilla, but I also want cheesy hashbrowns (or hashbrowns with gravy), but the thing I want most overall is black beans and rice.  I feel like it's been a million years since I've had black beans and rice.